Preparing for Irma

Everyone is concerned about the impending Hurricane Irma that is scheduled to strike Florida. It’d be very important to be prepared the best way possible for the worst. Therefore, a few tips for Shark students seem to be prudent at this time.

Hurricane preparedness is easy for men because all they need is a few packs of Slim Jims and the clothes on their backs, whereas females need a little more to prepare.

You might want to start off by getting some kind of floating device, such as a swan float or small boat, you may even want to get yourself a jet ski so you can transport yourself to the mall or Chick-Fil-A. They wouldn’t dare close in the event of a flood. It’s also imperative that you pick up a portable charger so that you can Snapchat and live stream the monstrosities you’re experiencing. And of course you need to look good for the attractive rescuers, so don’t forget your waterproof make up and hairdryer. Make sure you’re strapped with the best water gun you can find just in case you come face to face with any wild animals wondering the swamped streets. Make sure your car survives the storm by using some duct tape and pool noodles to keep it afloat.

All of these items are a necessity during a hurricane because if you ae going to go down, might as well do it in style. So put on your cutest swim suit and some water shoes, grab a floating koozie for your drink, and enjoy the day off from work and school.